Leave Me Be *Mercedes

[RACHEL BERRY]

There wasn’t much that Rachel had wanted to do anymore. The loss of her virginity also pulled the hatred and loathing from the New Directions, her so called friends and family, out into the open and dug into her soft skin like knife through butter. Her longing to be accepted and wanted was completely lost as the group decided to turn against her, and let their backs become more aquatinted with her more than even their faces. Finn had flipped when he found out, swinging at Jesse and in turn accidentally hitting her. Santana completely harassed her to the point of tears daily, and everyone just believed that her decision to sleep with jesse was a drunken one: It wasn’t entirely. Though her lack of mind didn’t mean that her body didn’t want his, a complete state of mind would have left the girl knowing exactly what she was doing, and wouldn’t have allowed herself to fall so hard in love with the older boy, and instead would have let her gently sway into his arms.

Walking into the choir room, Rachel tried to pull out some music, only to have her bag fall out of her hands and onto the floor, the music skirting in all directions as the girl just watched in an annoyed anger, but there was no passion or longing in her eyes to even lean over to pick up the precious papers. Instead she just stood there, thinking over and over that if she willed it long enough, her things would make a pile and then put themselves back into her bag. Rachel sighed, bending over and picking each paper up, one at a time, looking at the sheet music as it began to make a thick pile in her hands. Looking back and forth, the girl assumed that everyone would have been gone from the school already, so she was going to let herself soak in the last couple of days in the room she had spent so much time in, without being attacked.

Rachel sat at the piano and let her fingers tickle the ivories as there was the sound of steps outside—and her fingers halted, her heart raced and she held her breath, praying that it wouldn’t be someone too difficult. If she found herself alone with Santana, Rachel didn’t know if she would make it out of the room alive, probably die from embarrassment and a harassed soul. Peering over the edge of the piano seeing instead of some of the girls who have attacked her, it was Mercedes. Running her hand through her hair, the brunette looked down at the keys, unable to look the girl in the eyes as she spoke, “I thought you would have been gone.” Her voice was flat, emotionless, missing that Rachel beat—but there was nothing that Rachel could do about it.

Hey mercedes , this is for you, and just so you know, it is 479 words long and she is wearing an outfit coming soon. I think that this is totally short but i wanted to give you something, and give all of the credit to BR!TT.

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[MERCEDES JONES]

Mercedes had been sat in the choir room, her ratty old notebook in her lap, a pencil in her hand drumming on her knee and a look of concentration on her face. She had been sat in the corner of the choir room, kept hidden by the shadows cast by the setting sun outside, with her favorite notebook in her lap. This notebook was what Mercedes used as a journal as well as a song diary, a habit she had picked up since last year’s regionals competition, as well as where she jotted possible arrangements for mash-ups (she never bothered telling Mr. Schue though, too wary of her ideas being shot down for another Finchel 80’s rock balled that she could scream at the end of).
Today Mercedes was trying to put together a mash-up of Pixie Lott songs, an artist who Charlie had introduced her to and who the older girl believed deserved some form of homage being paid by the New Directions. That was when she heard the awfully familiar rustle of precious sheet music being dropped and someone attempting to scoop it back into order. Standing up, Mercedes peered across the room to see Rachel. Her outfit was actually cute, in a non-vomit inducing way today.

“Hey, Rachel” Mercedes said gently, stepping down from the top tier or chairs and helping Rachel gather her sheet music together. “Why are you hiding behind the piano, girl?” Mercedes smiled, but she knew why Rachel appeared so timid. Everyone was hating on her for losing her virginity to Jesse at the party, Santana gleefully leading the witch-hunt. Mercedes could see why people would be angry, but she honestly believed the argument should be between Finn and Rachel and the others should leave their noses firmly out.

“I thought that you would have been gone” Rachel’s voice was flat, no doubt the Jewish girl was trying to guard her emotions and expected a savage attack from Mercedes.

“Nice to see you hanging around for extracurricular tidbits too.” Mercedes joked, attempting to lighten Rachel’s mood. “No, if I’m honest I’ve just been trying to get a half an hour’s worth of concentration and peace. My brother’s home from college and everyone at home is arguing about him wanting to drop out, so I thought I’d stay here. I’m trying to write some possible mash-ups for sectionals.” Mercedes thought that bringing up what she assumed Rachel would see as her attempting to get the spotlight might coax the other diva out of her shell, but Rachel seemed just as numb and apprehensive, no doubt expecting Mercedes to be leading her into some kind of trap or for Santana to leap out of the piano with a rusty blade.

“Rachel, y’know, it might seem like it but the whole world isn’t out to get you. Just this morning I had a spat with Santana because I stopped her from throwing her banana at you.” Still, Mercedes’ efforts weren’t garnering much. “Hey, why don’t you look at my mash-up ideas? For this song, I thought maybe you and I could duet it?”

[RACHEL BERRY]

When Mercedes had been the one to enter the room Rachel wasn’t exactly thrilled, but in her mind she understood that it could have been a lot worse. Although Mercedes hadn’t been one to outwardly unpleasant to her, she wasn’t one who stood up for her, at least in the presence of Rachel. Glee had been deplorable the last week. The first day she was riddled by fear that people would know, that they would have found out, and the second her fears became a reality. Whether the abuse was physical, with both Finn and Santana, or mental, Santana leading the way but closer girls like Tina and Mercedes, it still hurt her. Rachel knew that the girls would say, until the day they died, that they never mentally abused her, the brunette had disheartening proof. The girls never seemed to agree with Santana, but they didn’t ever fight against her words. Wanting so much for someone to care enough for her to protect her, she would look to them where they had stayed silent in her seats until Rachel left the room. After the fact was out of Rachel’s hands she didn’t want to know, nor did she care. If they were going to stand up for her, they needed to do it to where it might actually help the girl.

Rachel listened to Mercedes talk, but the brunette’s eyes stayed interlocked on her fingers that were limply placed on the piano keys. The fact that everyone’s life was moving on and hers was locked in an ever spinning downward spiral, brought on by her so called friends. When the girl had brought up the idea of ‘Mashups’ Rachel only listlessly looked into Mercedes face and shrugged, “I didn’t know we were doing mashups. Usually doing things like that are my job.” A shot of venom trickled into her voice, but it was tinged so thickly with sadness that it was almost completely enveloped the annoyance in her voice. Rachel had always been the girl who had pulled the routines together, got the music, began the developing and personality and characters for each of the songs. To the broken girl it seemed like her ebony friend, or ex-friend, was trying to take her place. All that did was solidify that Rachel wasn’t needed anymore.

The girls words were hitting on the wrong spot with Rachel. Most would assume the ‘kind’ words would touch the girls heart, but hers was in so many pieces, you would have to be extremely careful, needing to watch and perfect your aim before you shot your words because if you hit her anywhere else it just hurt or angered her. “Really…? Really? The whole world isn’t out for me? Because the people I thought were my friends are now turning on me. The whole school is buzzing about me, and I can’t walk through the hall without having rude words spit at me or condoms thrown or stuffed in my locker! My world—this school, this glee club—is after me. People I don’t even know have been attacking my phone! Sending pictures and…and..” her words continued to fly, but Rachel had to take a breath as tears of anger and agony fell from her pretty eyes, “I’ve had to change my number. My dads had to change their home number because of the disgusting things that they said on our voicemail. They found out Mercedes, about the party, about the sex, about everything.” Pulling her shaking fingers off of the keys, she pulled them through her hair, finally covering her eyes and leaning her elbows on the piano. “You don’t understand a thing that I am going through so don’t tell me my life and my world isn’t crumbling around me.” She peaked through her fingers, her mascara staining around her orbs and she cleaned them quickly, running a finger under them before putting them in her lap, smoothing her skirt over her legs.

Pulling in a sharp intake of breath, Rachel rolled her eyes, leaving them gazing up to the celling as she shook her head sadly. “A duet…?” It was insulting to her that she would be doing a duet with Mercedes. Even if she had done them before, sharing a duet for such an important competition made Rachel want to cringe. People always sang duets with her—if at all—and Rachel had always been the one to sing a solo, now they were even trying to take that away from her. All Rachel could think of was the promise that Vocal Adrenaline had given her when her and her dads had gone to Carmel not two days ago. The promised solo’s weren’t the only things calling her name, but the fact that no one knew or cared about the fact that she had slept with Jesse St. James, In fact, some were in awe because he was still with her after. “Why don’t you just sing it yourself—save me the effort of having to prove that I am better than you.” Pulling her papers up, she looked over to Mercedes, “don’t even try to tell me that you don’t want my parts, my leads, my solo’s. Every time I get them I see the scowls in all of your faces.” Angrily she stuffed them into her bag, “You want my leads, then fine, you can have them. But you will truly be sorry when you don’t have me singing for you.” Slinging the faux leather over her shoulder, she walked around the opposite side of the piano, glancing once more at the girl sadly before starting out of the room.

Hey mercedes , this is for you, and just so you know, it is 942 words long and she is wearing an outfit coming soon. I think that rachel has a bit of a temper problem because of everyone being such a bitch to her., and give all of the credit to BR!TT.

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[MERCEDES JONES]

“Rachel” Mercedes said, her voice gentle as she recoiled from the girl’s sudden outburst. “You’re right, I don’t understand what’s happening to you, so why don’t you let me? I’m your friend, girl, I just want to help you. Plus, there’s nothing wrong with someone else organising a possible mash-up, right?” The diva couldn’t believe some of the terrible things that people were doing to Rachel and her family. She knew the family got a little hassle every now and then due to her parents both being men in a place like Ohio. Then came Rachel’s second barrage, slightly insulting Mercedes with how offended the Jewish girl sounded at doing a duet with her and then attacking her for ‘stealing’ her solos. Mercedes was momentarily stunned as Rachel got up, preparing for one of her famous storm outs, but recovered quickly. Moving with speed most wouldn’t expect from a girl her size, Mercedes rounded on Rachel and blocked the door, her nostrils flaring as she prepared a verbal assault of her own.

“Oh hell to the no!” she snapped, waving her finger so close to Rachel’s face that an observer might worry that the thinner of the two was in danger of losing an eye. “Rachel, I understand that you are going through a lot of crap at the minute, but I am not about to let you break off what is probably the only olive branch you’re going to get from anyone in this school.” Mercedes could feel the rage bubbling inside of her, threatening to break out.

“Hell yes, I get angry when you get solos and I don’t, but do you know why that is? Because I am just as powerful a singer as you in my own genre, and I’ve even proven that I can do Broadway, so I suggest you shut your nasty little mouth before I shut it for you!” Mercedes was almost shrieking towards the end of her tirade, glaring into Rachel’s eyes as she took several deep breaths, before finally picking up on what Rachel said at the end of her little tantrum.

“Wait, not singing for us anymore?” the black girl couldn’t help but smile as she tried to hold her chuckle in. “Please, Rachel, you’d never quit glee club. Sure, you’re doing well in most of your classes, but this is the only place you can get your coveted spotlight.” Sighing, Mercedes couldn’t help but wondering if this argument was worth the energy. Rachel had a stellar voice and there was no doubt that she was amazing, but so were many of the other members of the glee club, like Kurt and Santana. They won sectionals last year without Rachel on lead and they’d be able to do it again if she was determined to quit.

[RACHEL BERRY]

Rachel just played with her fingers as Mercedes continued to speak, but the more she did, the more naïve that she had seemed to her. Yes, the girl was her friend. Yes, she knew to an extent what was going on—but there was no way that Rachel could explain the hate and misery that she was going through every day. Sure she had kept a strong face, until Santana pretty much ripped her control off of her, but this was not only verbal and physical abuse, but it was also sexual abuse. There was also no way that Mercedes could believe that Rachel would want any help doing anything. Unless someone asked, Rachel had always done it herself without question. It was something of a stress relief for the brunette. “No one ever has helped me put a mash up together, it’s been that way since our sophomore year.” Trying to control her anger, she took a deep breath sighing, she continued, “Its like everyone says ‘yeah lets let her do the work and then gripe when she gets the solo—or maybe even take the hard work she has done.” Crossing her arms she was not pleased that anyone would even believe that they were better than her, because sure, there were people in New Directions that had talent, but Rachel had talent piled on sixteen years of classical vocal training, sixteen years of various dance backgrounds, thousands of trophies and certificates. She was one who could lite the crowd on fire no matter what she was doing and people thought that taking what was hers was ‘okay’. No.

The bigger girl rounded the corner and Rachel stumbled back as Mercedes snapped in her face, a glowing like she had been lit on fire. A tepid finger was surged in her soft porcelain face. Her eyes grew twice their size and a step back echoed through the words. Hands flew behind her as she grabbed the edge of the piano a slight quiver danced at the edge of her pretty pink pursed lips. But as the girl was screaming at her, it just made Rachel even more angry than she had already been before—not to mention the fact that a friend, especially one that had wanted to understand what she was feeling, wouldn’t scream at her at a time like this. “No olive branch would make me feel like this. If you want to understand what I’m going through, take a step back and look what you are doing now.” Rachel took a deep breath and let her eyes cast over the girl and to the floor before she flinched again, the next wave of screams coming at her.

“If you were just as powerful as I was then you would have the all the solos that I get. I am classically trained in more genre’s than you could even think and just because you like to sing and sing with your choir doesn’t mean that your voice is better or can match mine.” But as soon as the girl had threatened her Rachel broke and tears fell down her face, “You wonder! Wonder what I am going through and all you do is threaten me…?” Harassment was one of the hardest things for the girl to go through right now, and for one that truly wanted to care instead seemed like all she wanted to do is sneak in under her skin and pull out everything of hers while Rachel was still hurt. Mercedes was just kicking her while she was down.


It only took a moment for the black girl to hear what she had originally said at the end of her diatribe, but instead of being worried she just smiled, and Rachel could almost hear the laugh that was hiding in the back of her throat. Was she serious. “You don’t know what I have been driven to do, but because you don’t seem to care, I might as well just explain.” Pulling out a letter from her backpack she handed it to Mercedes. “It’s from Carmel. After my dads had to change their number I had to tell them everything, and every day, after a week they decided because Principal Figgans refused to do anything that we would take it into our own hands.” Crossing her arms Rachel continued almost narrating what was said in the letter. “They agreed that what the students, especially the ones in a club that is supposed to care for their members.” She took a deep breath, “We do accept Rachel Barbra Berry into our club and have no problem with taking her talent off of their hands if they continue to stifle it.” Rachel shrugged, watching Mercedes get to the end of the letter, “Please make sure to inform Mrs. Rachel Barbra berry that we have a student ready to take her classes for her, and the spot for lead vocalist is open for her, and cannot wait to see her next week.”

Rachel could feel her heart sink only a bit seeing as this girl was the first person to know she was transferring, but it needed to be known. “I’m leaving.”

Hey mercedes , this is for you, and just so you know, it is 866 words long and she is wearing an outfit coming soon. I think that rachel has a bit of a temper problem because of everyone being such a bitch to her., and give all of the credit to BR!TT.

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[MERCEDES JONES]

“You are so pig headed!” Mercedes stressed, part of her wanting to bang Rachel’s head against the piano until some sense was knocked into the girl. It was then that Rachel revealed the letter from Carmel.

“They agreed that what the students, especially the ones in a club that is supposed to care for their members.” She took a deep breath, “We do accept Rachel Barbra Berry into our club and have no problem with taking her talent off of their hands if they continue to stifle it. Please make sure to inform Mrs. Rachel Barbra Berry that we have a student ready to take her classes for her, and the spot for lead vocalist is open for her, and cannot wait to see her next week.”

It took Mercedes a few moments to actually register what Rachel was reading to her. She then snatched the letter out of her hand and examined it. It was complete with Carmel’s school crest and motto.

“I’m leaving”

“You’re a god damn coward.” Mercedes said quietly, her voice dangerously low. “Don’t you see you’re just going to be used for your talent? They are clearly doing everything they can to add your voice to their evil little machine. I mean, honestly, Rachel?! Getting some kid to take your classes for you? Don’t you think that that’s just a little pathetic?” Mercedes was in full steamroller mode now, prepared to demolish any defence Rachel tried to build. “I can’t believe you would just run from your troubles like this Rachel! Don’t you think this happens to any unpopular girl who loses her virginity? I mean, let’s be honest, when Santana lost her virginity she was cool, but when Tina lost hers she was a freak and a whore! I honestly thought you” by now Mercedes had a finger repeatedly prodding Rachel’s shoulder “had some character! Some backbone! I don’t understand how you can perform a song you wrote and bare your soul in front of hundreds of people at regionals and then perform again in front of thousands of people at Nationals yet you can’t stand up to some pathetic nobodies and a handful of your friends because you messed up!” Mercedes was right in Rachel’s face now, panting heavily. She hadn’t realised she’d allowed herself to get so worked up. She was actually incredibly close to punching Rachel’s lights out. As she took in the girl before her, Mercedes couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to the cocky, abrasive, strong-willed diva to be that she had once known.

[RACHEL BERRY]

Rachel only trembled with fear as the girl continued to yell at her. Mercedes didn’t quite understand how Rachel could act and sing circles around her. When Jesse had brought it forward that she was the most talented out of the four whom had performed, she nearly wanted to hit him. Instead of controlling her anger, she always had wanted to take it out and now she was being showed once more that not only was Rachel a better singer, but she was also the bigger person (not physically). Looking up to her, deranged passion in her eyes slowly she just breathed out, feeling her annoyance fall with each breath, “This coming from a girl who is tormenting a girl who has been attacked non-stop the last two weeks, in front of her friends, at her house. I could say so many things about how my, ‘friends’” Rachel pulled air quotes around her speech but then dropped her hands continuing, “Protecting me and caring for me are things that they, that you, have said you would do. But you sit in this class daily and let Santana rip me apart until I give up and leave. How is that fair…? How is that Kind…? How does that show that anyone cares for me…? It doesn’t.” Crossing her arms she scowled, “You and everyone besides Kurt are ENABLING Santana and her crew.” Rachel was upset but she couldn’t tell if she was angry or sad, all of her emotions swirled so strong around her mind that she could barely even think. Words that came from her lips didn’t go through her normal Rachel filter and instead just continued to come, “And no one seems to give a flying fuck what happens to me.”

“A coward…? Coward…?! Do you know how much I have had to do not only to get past going to Mr. Figgans, but telling my dads about every party..? Coward because I am going somewhere else…? Coward because I am through putting up with all of this drama that is unneeded in my theatre life…? Coward because I am leaving new directions….?” It didn’t make sense to her, Rachel was not a coward, never in her life had she been one. Even when she was a child she never got stage fright, instead now the girl was going to blame her leaving because she didn’t want to have people throw condoms at her and egg her house…? Enough was enough and if she had to stop what was going on by leaving the school, she would. “And what about Kurt.?! Was he a GOD DAMN coward when he left because he was being attacked…? No, he was a fucking hero because he was going after something he believed in. That’s one damn double standard isn’t it…?” Her eyes were filling with tears. No one was listening to her, just because she was the team captain and the leader of new directions that didn’t mean that she was indestructible, in fact it was clear that the girl was just the opposite.

When Mercedes brought on the fact that they were going to use her, she threw up her hands, “What are you supposed to do with talent Mercedes?! Hide it so that no one can see it and stifle it until it cries out to be heard…? It needs to be used! To be seen! If they are going to give me the face time and the solos that I deserve then there is no reason that I should stay. Staying here in New Directions clearly has done nothing for me and only pulled my talent to a level that people can actually believe that they could match—in which case is wrong.” Her pride rose as she continued. “It doesn’t matter for my classes, Broadway stars don’t need to know AP chem, They don’t need to know every important document that found its way to being because of the war front of World War Two! They have to act and sing, and that is my passion, and my forte.”

“ITS NOT JUST THE FACT I LOST MY VERGINITY!” Rachel was screaming at the girl, a sense of utter loathing was boiling up past her diaphragm, “Sure, it contributes, but no matter how much I try, nothing I do gets accepted. Nothing I do has people loving or caring for me. Nothing I whisper, I write, I sing, I write, I sing!” Her repeating only rose in tone as she pushed Mercedes away, “Its great if you write a song and sing it, everyone is like ‘what a wonderful thing she has done’ but this great double standard thing means that it doesn’t matter who, but if I sing my own written song, the words echo behind my back, ‘its berry again. What the hell. She’s not even that talented.’. Some damn friends you are.” Throwing her hands in the air she ran her fingers through her hair.

Rachel shook her head, the tears staining her face black as she stood at the door, “I am going to Vocal Adrenaline because they will showcase every talent that I have. I am going because even if they are ‘soulless’ that means not only will they not care, it also means that they won’t dare touch a hair on the talent filled me. I am going because for once in my life I am going to be put out into the world to where every single producer will see me. Vocal Adrenaline will get me somewhere, somewhere new directions never has.” Throwing her hand down to her side she looked Mercedes up and down. “I am going to Vocal Adrenaline because my life is about Theatre, not drama, about blocking, not fighting, about singing, not screaming—my life is about being happy and showing the world my talent. Having all of you throw your sticks and stones has been minor inconveniences. Jesse and I will be working together for Vocal Adrenaline, and after we are off to Broadway.” Turning, Rachel said the last of her words without looking to the girl, “I hope you like it here, because staying in New Directions will only lead to a Lima Loser.” This school, this club, this town, she was done—and Carmel was ready for her. Rachel had a backbone, there was no doubting that, just Mercedes took her leaving as being without one, while she should see that leaving was the best thing she could have ever done.

Hey mercedes , this is for you, and just so you know, it is 1086 words long and she is wearing an outfit coming soon. I think that yay, and give all of the credit to BR!TT.

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